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Thread: Heres my story, reuploaded.

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    Gunzfactorian Guardian luge's Avatar
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    Default Heres my story, reuploaded.

    Here it is... its my story once more, updated, but not fully updated, don't when I'll get around to finishing the update.
    Randolph Budd's anime story. by ~lugexd on deviantART

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    Gunzfactorian Hero
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    Default Re: Heres my story, reuploaded.

    Walls of Text

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    Gunzfactorian Guardian luge's Avatar
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    Default Re: Heres my story, reuploaded.

    um, no duh? its a story....

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    Gunzfactorian Guardian
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    Default Re: Heres my story, reuploaded.

    I think what ExPDawg was trying to say was that the story starts with one dull paragraph followed by another dull paragraph, and followed by another, etc.

    Spice things up a bit, everything happens a bit too quickly and sometimes when I'm reading it the story just sounds a bit lame, like as if it was written by a ten year old.

    I wish that you don't take this comment as an insult, but merely a humble review from another fellow writer.

    Good luck on your next chapter!

    -Sigh

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    Gunzfactorian Guardian Sarcor's Avatar
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    Default Re: Heres my story, reuploaded.

    Omg. Thats almost like my story except with more details.
    Click here to move into my own minicity!
    -->HERE
    P.S. +Rep anyone who likes Dragonforce.
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    Gunzfactorian Guardian luge's Avatar
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    Default Re: Heres my story, reuploaded.

    This is no where close to finished, but, I don't take it as an insult, but it depends on the writer on how fast the story moves. Alot of people I know from my school, they say that they like how it moves fast, others say that it moves too fast.... its all opinion... hell, my english teacher said that it was good as is, instead of taking a few chapters to get into the action.

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    Gunzfactorian Commando Ailysa's Avatar
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    Default Re: Heres my story, reuploaded.

    Quote Originally Posted by ExPDawg View Post
    Walls of Text
    @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

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